One of the things that saddened me even before I became a parent is how toxic discussions about infant feeding have become. This post is in no way a comment on anyone else’s personal circumstances or parenting decisions and I am just an ordinary mother, not a health professional. I hope that this post will be helpful to others expecting twins who hope to breastfeed. This blog is a hobby and I do not make any money from it, so anything recommended below is there because I found it useful.
While the babies are still “cooking”:
My only regret is that I took the time to research breastfeeding in pregnancy but didn’t target my research specifically enough at feeding multiples. In particular, I didn’t think carefully enough about the possibility that my babies might come early or the birth not go to plan. I did a FutureLearn course in Infant Nutrition, attended a breastfeeding session as part of my NCT course and went especially to an NHS breastfeeding class. I was enraptured by a video of a newborn crawling across the mother’s chest to latch and decided that my babies would be breastfed in the first hour of life and hopefully exclusively breastfed.
Roll on to the thirty-fourth week of pregnancy and, after my waters went suddenly on Twin 1 and an induction, I pushed T1 for over two hours before he was delivered by forceps (with an episiotomy and a tear). Twin 2’s cord prolapsed and he was an emergency c section forty-seven minutes later. At this point I lost a lot of blood (which led to two transfusions) and there was an issue with the anaesthetic while I was being stitched up. The upshot was that my twins were given formula while I was still on an operating table, I began parenthood delirious with exhaustion and my milk took a while to come in. My Twin 2 was unable to suckle and needed tube feeding to get him going even with a bottle and it took some weeks to get him to latch. Soon after returning home from hospital I had gastroenteritis and became very dehydrated.
One result of this tricky start is that I have never exclusively breastfed – my babies have one formula feed a day, in the evening. This works for us as a couple, not least because it involves my wife in the feeding and means that the boys are not entirely dependent on me. However, it would have been possible for me to breastfeed my twins exclusively and plenty of people do. I’m not going to beat myself up about any of the choices I’ve made or how I reacted to some difficult situations as life is too short. However, with hindsight, the things I would change would be to look into expressing colostrum in later pregnancy and to look into donor milk, and to talk to the midwives more clearly at delivery. I did not have a birth/feeding plan printed out to take into hospital with me when my waters went early and straight after birth I was in no state to think clearly about anything.
The early weeks:
I do wish that more of the professionals I encountered ante-natally had been more honest about how difficult breastfeeding can be. Feeding my twins has been a joy but it has also, at times, been challenging, especially in the early stages of “cluster feeding” (when a baby wants many, many short feeds in succession). In pregnancy I had managed to stay reasonably active but within a few weeks of almost endlessly feeding my little guys while mess piled up around me and nothing at all was achieved apart from keeping them alive, my back completely seized up. I also developed mastitis quite early on, which was definitely a low point.
Encouragingly – and from what I can see from others’ posts, this seems to be the case for most people – it DOES GET EASIER. Now, even my finicky little twin latches well and feeds efficiently and breastfeeding is much more of a pleasure than a chore. It takes so little time these days and the only feed that is super-long is their first of the day.
Troubleshooting:
I’m a qualified scuba diving instructor (not currently instructing) and, as part of basic training, those new to the hobby are told how to react to various problems – losing a diving buddy, running low or out of air, making an uncontrolled ascent etc. These are all issues that should never happen but all new divers are told how to respond to them. I guess nobody wants to make breastfeeding sound difficult or to be discouraging towards a pregnant lady – but I have a feeling that many women only realise that feeding problems exist when they are immersed in the experience at a vulnerable time post-natally. If you are the kind of person who likes to anticipate problems in order to try to overcome them, it might be worth thinking about aversion, blebs, blocked ducts, mastitis and nipple shape/needing nipple shields and nursing strikes (I’m sure that’s not an exhaustive list but there is plenty of info out there). Rather like scuba diving, I think the magic of the whole experience can be enhanced by knowing that it’s possible to extricate oneself from difficulties.
Support:
Online – the group that has helped me most was the Facebook Group “Breastfeeding Twins and Triplets UK” https://www.facebook.com/BfTwinsUk/ – the files have so, so much information about tandem positions, overcoming problems and about the experience of feeding multiples. I wish I had found it earlier. It’s also nice to touch base with other twin mums and the recommendation for “topless TV afternoons” made joining this worthwhile in itself. I also joined the FB breastfeeding group for my local area.
Professionals – my area, Portsmouth, UK, has a breastfeeding support team and I asked for a home visit to help me get Twin 2 to latch when we continued to struggle after leaving hospital, which was fantastic.
Groups – my area has breastfeeding groups at family hubs. I’ve only been a few times but it has been nice to chat and has also reinforced that breastfeeding is a long game – right now at six and a half months I feel confident with it and it is mostly very enjoyable. However, I know that continuing weaning, the emergence of teeth and my return to work will present new challenges and it’s nice to know that I will be able to talk to mothers who have fed for long periods and through the different stages.
Wife and family –this warm and wonderful support has been the most important of all. Get your folks on board.
Useful items:
Feeding pillow – If you want to tandem feed regularly at home, an infant feeding pillow suitable for twins is a must. I loved my Peanut and Piglet, bought second hand, as I found that it supported my back well. Different brands suit different body types, so do some research before buying.
Nursing bras– One mistake I made was to buy soft bras intended for night-time as my breasts were so swollen in the early days. Six months on, I’ve woken up to the fact that I won’t be breastfeeding forever and that if I’m not careful my décolletage will be heading south soon. I should have got some sports/underwired/supportive bras earlier on. Again, different brands suit different people but, after trying a few, my favourite so far is Hotmilk https://uk.hotmilklingerie.com/ In particular, the sleep bras with in-built pads have been amazing (before I discovered these I wasted a lot of time hunting for missing breast pads in twisted duvets).
Reusable breast pads – In pregnancy, I bought plenty of disposable pads. These have their place but I soon switched to washable ones. They crease less and are far more comfortable, especially in hot weather. I use the Boots ones.
Net bags for the washing machine – nursing bras are often expensive and a net bag, as well as stopping breast pads from getting lost in a wash, can make delicate and frequently washed items last longer.
The Milky Tee Co https://www.milkyteecompany.com/ – there are so many nursing tops and dresses out there. I like the ones from Jojo Maman Bébé https://www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/ (which has a discount for TAMBA members) but my winner has to be the t shirts and tops from The Milky Tee Co. They have the zips to the side and make even tandem feeding very discreet. They are on the pricey side but I have worn mine nearly to death.
Breast pumps – I’ll be honest, I have never managed to pump loads (except when in hospital with their high grade pump) but the electronic one that suited me best was the Medela Swing. I generally prefer to use a hand pump, and on the two occasions I have left my twins have found the Phillips Avent one small enough to carry with me. It also works well for expressing small amounts to add to weaning purees.
Milk collectors – these are worth having as it’s amazing how much milk can be lost from the breast you are not feeding with (when feeding just one twin). I bought the Avent shells but really want to look into the Haakaa, as this seems to be working for many of my friends.
Happy days:
I am so pleased that I have been able to breastfeed my twins, even if it has not been exclusively. I wasn’t able to control what happened with their arrival in the world but I have been able to give them this benefit. All my experiences of feeding in public have been very positive indeed (I try to avoid tandem feeding in public when I can as it’s tricky to manage but have done it a few times when both boys have cried at once). Every mother is different and has unique circumstances but for me personally it has been very important and I love the warmth and snuggles. For the first eight weeks or so breastfeeding felt incredibly hard but now, especially at night, it seems much easier than making bottles up would have been. It’s also saved us a ton of cash, although health and bonding have been the biggest pros.
I hope reading about my experience has been useful to someone out there expecting twins.
Turning the Leaves 